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Fangs (1978)
Movie Review by The Undertaker

Fangs (1978) The fangs here belong to a host of snakes used to kill off people who pretty much needed it. They should have called this flick The Ballad of Snakey Bender because the focus and most interesting thing here is that character. You see, Snakey Bender is a reclusive old snake-loving coot that keeps many a scaly, slithering pet. He's not mean or a killer, just a bit eccentric. He pays kids to bring him snakes and does his best to educate the younguns about reptiles and such. Most people just feel he's an old harmless nut and don't worry about him much at all. Snakey's got a buddy he hangs out with on one special night of the week, when they get together and listen to old marching band records turned up loud and shoot the shit. Everything's cool until his buddy starts seeing some striper chick and plans to get married. It seems after that Snakey's life goes downhill. He has a special relationship with the sexy local schoolteacher also. She has a bit of a strange fetish you see, one that only Snakey's snakes can satisfy. She stops by now and then late at night when no one will see and gets her some satisfaction. She loves to roll naked and have a huge snake crawl over her body while she gets herself off. Snakey doesn't mind the show either. After awhile though, she decides she can no longer come by as it's too risky for her and she doesn't wanna get caught at 'that' place. Well, Snakey gets a bit pissed. He also gets pissed at his friend who no longer wants to hang out. His buddy now only wants to watch his old lady dance and fuck (can't say I blame him though), this leaves Snakey a bit lonely and a bit pissed. At this point, the film gets mean and Snakey gets revenge. Using his pets, he kills off his former friend, the hot teacher, and a few others that have wronged him in very cool ways. The murders look very painful and it's creepy the way he executes these folks. The barrel scene was both sick and funny. If you like snake movies, they get no better than this. Great acting, story, and lots of slithering make this a personal fav along with Sssssssss, Spasms, Stanley, and Rattlers. The whole teacher sex thing was wild and kinda kinky. A classick for sure, you need to see this if you can find it, as it's not easy these days. Poor old Snakey Bender just wanted a few friends and a peep show now and then. Is that too much for a man to have I ask?
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