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06.28.2017
King Kong (2005)
Movie Review by The Mortician
05.04.16

King Kong (2005) Peter Jackson's amped up take on the KONG story. Moviemakers head to the lost "Skull Island" to shoot their latest backyard epic with free production value- dinosaurs, giant bugs, and of course, Kong himself. Set in 1933, the first hour of this one is super-boring with endless "character development" that does not work (the Ed Wood director, the screenwriter with great ideas and the heart of gold, the goody-goody actress that won't sell out to nudity and sex- BLAH BLAH!) and finally, we get to the island where the cast interacts with a "lost world" of sorts. The next 30 minutes feel more like a JURASSIC PARK movie, complete with dinosaur chases and encounters with prehistoric bugs. It's okay, but we've seen it all before, and done better. Finally King Kong enters the scene and he's worth watching- excellent effects and full of emotion and rage. The (very ugly!) natives kidnap Ms. Goody Two Shoes , Kong falls in love with her (essayed by Naomi Watts), and the movie plays out much like the two previous versions. Kong battles bugs and not one T-Rex, but THREE in an overlong, overcomplicated scene that goes on waaay too long, although still delivering the goods by the end. Dead Wood moviemaker (Jack Black) sees opportunity with bringing Kong home to make money, and they chloroform him and put him on display for New York gawkers, where once again, he goes on a rampage, finds his girl Friday, climbs the Empire State building, and battles planes to his death. Virtual Kong shows lots of emotion and there's great chemistry between Watts and Kong, and as always, I felt sad when Kong meets his demise. Taken out of the wild by greedy humans, used and abused, the movie shows how selfish and cold-hearted man is towards nature and animals. Kong was only retaliating against the evil men doing him wrong all along, and it's so sad when we blow him to pieces with our little planes at the end. KONG '05 is overblown and overlong but still is a good watch for the CGI ape scenes. The characters are nowhere near as good as the previous versions in '33 and especially '76, my personal fave. And wow, where was the nudity? Even a quick flash of breasts! Come on! With all the technology, Kong should've at least fingered Ms. Watt's top down Jessica Lange style. That whole sexy scene was completely missing in this version and THAT is unforgiveable, Mr. Jackson! It's always been a highlight of the story for us! Worth a look for KONG completists, though ultimately kind of disappointing.

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