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08.19.2017
Witchboard III: The Possession (1995)
Movie Review by The Mortician
12.12.12

Witchboard III: The Possession (1995) Not sure how I missed this one so long ago, but somehow I missed Part 2 as well. The original WITCHBOARD was a pretty cool movie starring the Whitesnake video chick who plays with a Ouija board and unleashes a demon of some sort that slowly possesses her. This movie is pretty much the same plot, only this time it's a couple living in an apartment building having some bad financial times. Unemployed financial manager Brian (David Nerman) gets chummy with the building landlord, Francis (Cedric Smith). Francis has a Ouija board and gets Brian to use it---he says that there's spirits out there that will help him get rich "in the money markets." One of them give him some inside trading info on coffee stocks going up, and ol' Brian gets money loaned to him from the mob (no joke here!) and invests---making a fortune. (Later the spirit kills the mafia dudes in a pointless scene when they want the money back with interest!) In the meantime, Francis has the hots for Brian's wife Julie (Elizabeth Lambert), who thankfully loves to take her clothes off and show us her breasts and other assets every ten minutes or so in lame softcore love scenes. At least THIS kept me watching and actor David Nerman got to have some fun rolling around with her naked. Now, Francis confides in Brian that he's dying and decides to kill himself right in front of his friend...stepping off his high outdoor patio. Brian is addicted to the Ouija board, keeps playing for that monetary income, and somehow...the now deceased Francis possesses his body from beyond, nearly killing Brian by electrocution, yet "shoving out" his soul into mirrors (!) so he can have control over Brian's body---and the hot-ass wife Julie! The funniest scenes are when Francis, in Brian's body, is dogging his wife while the "real" Brian is forced to watch from mirrors, screaming "Noooo That's not me!" And no, I'm NOT making any of this up, this movie has no suspense, no logic, and really...no rationale for even existing other than showing off Elizabeth Lambert's taut body. Did I mention that she disrobes quite frequently? Oh yeeaaaaaah! Anyway, Francis in Brian's body gets "demonic crazy" and tries to get Francis and her best friend into a little threesome---and sadly, this really upsets Francis. (Why can't real life be like in the porno movies where the hot wife and her best friend get down to business with the sex-starved hubby with no guilt? Damn real life!) The girlfriend is pretty hot and does some fast flashing for us when ol' Francis-in-Brian's-body comes back to breed with her later on and she rejects him---so he kills her for no reason, really. The Francis/Brian demon evidently wants to mate with a woman...to create some sort of demon...which again, makes absolutely no sense since it's Brian's body he's in, and the spirit Francis is only inhabiting Brian's body. It's highly doubtful that a human body simply possessed by a different, malicious spirit would make a demon baby---if you really believed this was possible. Oh well, with logic right out of the window from about the fifteen-minute mark, the plot rolls on with Brian in the mirror, trying to contact his wife and get her to use the Ouija board to unravel the plot and let his spirit free. It all ends with a bizarre confrontation where Brian somehow jumps back into his body and Francis' spirit becomes some kind of "man in a rubber suit demon" that they have to battle... in the living room! Yep, this thing is super low budget, folks. By then, Ms. Lambert has stopped flashing us her goods and I was about falling asleep, but...it was complete utter nonsense and dribble. Sadly, I cannot recommend this movie at all unless you just want to see Elizabeth Lambert and her naked mounds of curvaceous flesh here and there, otherwise, this thing offers very little entertainment value at all. If you want a good WITCHBOARD movie, re-watch the original! Shame on the makers of this film on all counts, especially for ignoring all the "rules" of demonic possession!

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